Thursday, February 16, 2017

Happy Anniversary to Me




15 years ago, the husband and I married, in Seaside, Ca. It was a second marriage for both of us. I'm not a mushy person...but was thinking about a few things, about my marriage and this anniversary.

NEVER did I ever think, I would remarry again. I was enjoying my divorced/single life. In fact, the first month of our marriage, I was grieving my old life - going out with my girlfriends, hosting friends at my house and just being me. I loved my husband - it just took me awhile, to feel like a married couple.

It's quite the adjustment, after you have been divorced. My sons were overly protective and they didn't take too kindly, to him trying to take the place of their dad. My husband had to learn the hard way. We had to go to counseling due to a big argument and hurt feelings, with my sons. We got through it. He finally got it. Even though their father was a Dead-beat, they still loved him.

In the 15 years, we have had a lot of death. There for awhile, it was one HIT after another.  Of course, the biggies, was my son a year after we married and my mom's suicide. That's when you know, you have a keeper. That man, could of split on me - My grieving was so intense.

We moved, 3 times in those 15 years. The first 4 years we lived in our 34 ft motor home - while we paid off debt and saved money. We had a blast! After that, we lived in a cute 1 bedroom apartment for 2 years. That was fun too. Then the final move, was after my Mom passed and we made the BIG decision to move 250 miles to the north - to live in my parents home. (I did not grow up in this home) We took a 45% drop in pay. It took us awhile to re-adjust to a simpler life. We bought out my sister's half and we've been here for 9 years and LOVE IT.

Now we're in our 60's. This is a good marriage. I knew in my first marriage at about 2 years, that I was in trouble. I stayed for 24 years and 3 sons. So, I know. Any rough bumps in the road, we are able to work through - the worst being, when our adult children lived with us for a few years.


15 years later


We made it through and now life is better than ever. We just have to stay healthy so we can grow old together.

8 comments:

  1. Hi Debby, You came by my blog...so I came to visit yours. Looks like you and your fellow made it all work. You have been through some tough times. Here's wishing you and your hubby many more years of loving life together. Blessings, xoxo, Susie

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  2. Happy anniversary to you both! What a sweet love story to read! And indeed a keeper he was to stick with you through the grief of your son's passing and your mom's passing so close together. I've been married close to 37 years and I'm not sure I would want to be married again. I enjoy marriage but I've never been "single" if that makes sense. Lived with my mom before I got married, lived with my hubby thereafter. I think I would enjoy setting my own routine, assuming I'm the one that is "left behind."

    To many more years for you and your hubby!

    betty

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    Replies
    1. Thank you. If you can make it work, as a single, it can be fun.

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  3. I'm glad you're happy now, Debby. So many changes going on with me too, my friend.

    ~Sheri

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    Replies
    1. That's life isn't it. We know this NOW but when you are young, we tend to take those changes hard. I hope you can transition through your changes with ease and wisdom.

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  4. Debby, Happy Anniversary! I am so sorry to hear about the lose of your son and your mother's suicide. ((Hugs)) How are you doing?
    Our daughter and her husband lived with us for 6 1/2 years. They moved to Montana after Thanksgiving last year. Our son came home in January 2016 after moving to Pittsburgh the year before. His fiance cheated on him, it was very sad. He just moved out two weeks ago with a new job at City of Hope and engaged to be married in November. The other Debby.....

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    Replies
    1. Hi Debby, I am doing great these days. Wow, so you know about the adult kids moving back home. I had a few friends, where the same thing happened to them - taking in the adult kids. It's when they don't leave - that's a problem.

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Comments are good - I admit, sometimes I don't respond back, in time for a dialog. I bad! I will TRY and do better. Thanks for understanding.

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