Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Just some thoughts on death and dying




Death fascinates me. Stephanie's husband said, he held her in his arms, as she passed. I have heard people can actually "feel" something, an energy - when people finally pass on. I have felt that, with my dog, Sport - I was with him, when he finally let go and I could feel a difference in his body.

I'm not afraid of death - like I used to be. Or at least I don't think I am. I just hope it comes swift and with no pain.

When my son died, people would tell me, that he is a angel now - and that he is watching over me. And while the sentiment is beautiful - I really don't believe that. I don't believe we become angels after we die. From a Christian POV, we become higher than the angels and quite frankly, while we will be made fully aware I don't think we are going to sit around UP there, watching us down here. I would hope my Michael, is enjoying his eternal rest with God and doing whatever it is, they do UP there.

Sometimes I have this feeling I am going to live a very long time. Like into my 90's, I don't know how I feel about that. I am afraid I will outlive my children, though.  I hope not. I look at my Aunt Mae, 95 years old and still doing well. She has outlived all her siblings.

I can't see, buying a expensive casket. I just can't see it! I guess I will be cremated. I think the whole body-disposal-thing is kinda yucky really. I don't believe I really care but making plans are good for helping out your loved ones. It's not for YOU. Just like services. I won't be there. It is for the living.

When my Mom died, we had her cremated. For some reason, there was a backup and her cremation was delayed. Her service was the next day and we called the funeral home to check on her "status". That was so creepy. That afternoon, we went up to pick up her ashes. (cremains)  When the man, handed the box to us, the ashes were still warm. As we drove home, my sister was holding them, on her lap, and she told me, they were more than warm - they were actually HOT and burning her legs. That evening, we placed "Mom" on a table, under a pot holder as to not burn the table and made a display - The next morning, when we were getting ready to go - those ashes were still warm. Next time a loved one dies, I want those cremains to be room temperature or whatever is the normal temperature.

I sure do miss all those who have gone on, before me. There have been times in my life, where I actually felt envious - that they were all in a better place.  I sure HOPE it is a "better place." Like a forever, eternal retirement place. I hope we don't just die. and that's it. Although that would be better, than going to Hell. I hear that is worse than a Redding summer.

I hope you all were not tweaked out by this post. I mean, we are all ADULTS and we all are going to DIE one day. I frankly believe we don't talk enough about death and dying and that is why the grieving is so hard for those left behind. It is natural.  We live and we die.




















11 comments:

  1. I don't mind discussing death, Coffee Lady. Your observations gave us a lot to think about. I am very sorry to know that you outlived your son. Thank you for sharing all that you did here.

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    1. You are very welcome. It needed to be said.

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  2. I have been thinking of death lately as well. I always keep getting this vision that I will pass out in a public place and since there is no safe method to save my heart ( long story), I am going to write off a DNR to make it easy on every one.
    Turning into an angel is very gratifying for the loved ones.

    We believe that we stay in a state of deep sleep like trans and wake up on the judgement day. Then we go to Heaven according to our deeds.

    I was not not there for my Mom or my Dad when they died. My brother says that he could feel death taking away our Dad very slyly.
    My sister was there for Mom. She said that she made our Mom pray to get the fear of death under control.
    Take care of yourself. What ever happens, I hope that it is easy on every one.

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    1. Wow - I'm not that "ready" to write a DNR. But I don't want to be kept on machines and such. That is just plain crazy.

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  3. I think it was one of your better posts a a little funny too. Cremate me, don't tell anyone, "oh, where'd she go? Where is my sandwich.?"

    Ha

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    1. Thank you. I thought it was a little funny too. You have to laugh at death.

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  4. I feel no fear of death. I know where I'm going and I can't wait to meet some of the people there and to see my deceased dogs again. I told my kids not to even bother with having me embalmed. They can just cremate me and throw out the ashes. No need even for a temporary coffin. I don't want them spending their inheritance on stuff I don't need.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Oh me too. It will be a happy reunion.

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  5. Death does frighten me, but only because I don't want my life to end in a gruesome way. I mean like being murdered or being trapped in a burning building or something like that.

    Death is such a mystery to me. I have heard people say that when a person dies, their body remains in the grave until the end... meaning when Jesus returns. I often wonder if that's true, when I visit my mother's grave. I've also heard that, in death, the spirit leaves the body and immediately travels to either heaven or hell. Maybe I've watched 'Ghost' too many times, but that is my favorite Patrick Swayze movie.

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    1. I wouldn't want to die like that either. I tend to not dwell on that kind of death. I hope I just die in my sleep when I am old. Peaceful.

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  6. Death is a difficult thing for many to talk about, I never knew what to say to my girls when they were little, I am not afraid of dying I am just not ready to do so I have so much to live for

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Comments are good - I admit, sometimes I don't respond back, in time for a dialog. I bad! I will TRY and do better. Thanks for understanding.

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