Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Being forgiven is a good thing





I am feeling so good right now. A huge burden, has been released and FINALLY I feel FREE.  Sometimes, some of us, get into a type of bondage of our own making. It can last years. We can even conjure up, that it was more important than it really was - I don't feel embarrassed at all, that I had to force this release. I did it for me.

I had never been forgiven for something I had done to a person years ago.  It would gnaw at me when I would think of it.  I felt I had done this person wrong. I thought I had really hurt this person. I hated the idea that I might have hurt someone - I don't like to hurt people. This however, did not mean I want a relationship with this person. I wanted to be forgiven, so I could forgive myself.

It finally donned on me, that I had to do something, BOLD for my own emotional well-being. I am worth it.  I had to basically let go of my pride - and ask to be forgiven because it was still messing with my head. Up to this point, I had never been forgiven.

I got butterflies in my stomach, when I saw the email. It was exactly what I needed to see in print. 

I was surprised I wasn't even hurt by the harsh-tone. I finally received my walking papers - The person forgave me (of course they just had to say, it was all perceived in my own mind. So be it. I got what I wanted)  and that this person never wants to hear from me again.  Thank God!  We used to say in  Alanon, that we can surely forgive someone - but that doesn't mean we have to have a relationship with them.

Little does this person know - they gave me a gift - the gift of forgiveness so that I can now forgive myself.






3 comments:

  1. The word "forgiveness" is a wonderful word. Forgiving others mistakes and talking to them if make them realize their mistake and to make friendship with us. It is most powerful word.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is freeing - however, I wasn't after friendship. I just needed to be forgiven. It had bothered me for many years.

      Delete
  2. Through Facebook, I have come in contact with a friend from high school. We spoke on the telephone a couple of times. I apologized for something I had done. She said she never felt I had done anything wrong. She was very kind. We aren't going to travel great distances to see each other, but we have a nice friendship and talking to her helped me feel better about something that happened so very long ago.

    Love,
    Janie

    ReplyDelete

Comments are good - I admit, sometimes I don't respond back, in time for a dialog. I bad! I will TRY and do better. Thanks for understanding.

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