Sunday, July 21, 2019

Just a little confession

Maybe it's because of the surgery - but lately, I seem to get down. Not depressed but I just feel hopeless. I'm keeping it to myself for now. I'm also tired. At night, I get those muscles cramps and they wake me up. I always get back to sleep, but it takes its toll on me, during the day. The last 3 days, I am having to take an afternoon nap. I get up, bright-eyed and happy at 6am every morning. But the closer to my afternoon nap, I get down.

I've been on anti-depressants for over 20 years. I just recently before my surgery, dropped my dose down to a lower mg. and it has been fine EXCEPT for this. Might have nothing to do with actual depression and more to do with my age (65) and the surgery.

I also have so much to do - in the morning I try and do some of the things, and then I poop out. I have all these half-finished projects.

I know depression and I've had it so bad, that it's been scary. I haven't had it like that in years - It's like my mind is trying to have me go into depression. Does that make sense?

I also think I am a little sad. My youngest son Navy will be getting married in Feb and while I am happy for him, it's just that new realization that he is not my baby anymore. Our relationship has changed. He doesn't call me like he used to or answer my texts.

My other son, Foodie hasn't called or texted for 2 months. It's like he is distancing himself from me. He lives with his brother and fiancee and they will be moving to their own place soon and so Foodie will have to get a place of his own. He tends, to wait till the last minute. So the last time I spoke with him, I told him, that he better get on the ball, because he isn't living with us AGAIN. He took it fine and said, he understood but maybe I was too blunt. Of course between you and me, if any of my children needed help, of course, we would help. But it's not like I want to broadcast, "oh sure you can move back home." because I know him. He won't even try.

My parents did that to me. They told me once I move out, I can never come back.  WOW. So when I did, I planned and made sure it would work. Years later, just before she died, I mentioned that to her, and that is when she told me, that my dad and she would have - they just wanted us to make good solid decisions; which I did.

I may be a Mom, but I no longer "parent" them and that is frustrating. They are on their own. I just wish they would call once a month or text me a smiley face now and then.

Saturday, July 20, 2019

Just a petty waste of time

According to my husband, Boss Lady was visually uncomfortable when the President of the Union local showed up. The union Rep then proceeded to say to her,

"I recognize you. You are the one who uses intimidation and "hearsay" with your employees." 

The union local's president is also a woman!

The serious meeting had to do with a contractor coming onto the site. This is a secure, gated Veterans Home and they are required to ask everyone who comes to the gate, who they are there to see and their purpose if they don't know about it ahead of time. When asked by my husband, the contractor didn't like it. He copped an attitude, mentioned it to another employee (don't know who that was) who then, in turn, reported it to the Boss Lady. THAT WAS IT!

The contractor was not at the meeting and the other employee asked to be anonymous.

Sounds pretty petty to me.

She was asked by the union Rep, where she was going with these complaints; Boss Lady said, 

"They will go into my personal desk files for my eyes only."

In other words, it wouldn't be in my husband employment file.

What a waste of time. It's all part of her intimidation and she uses these kept files for those purposes.

He also learned from the Union Rep, that Boss lady has a few grievances pending from other employees.

You would think, she was managing prison felons. She automatically thinks they are all up to no good and her job, is to try and find negative things on them, to fire them. Not to manage or be a leader. No, she is a prison guard. She should be ashamed of herself. Those in security, are retired military and law enforcement. They care more about the Veterans in the Home than she does. She is neither military or former law enforcement.  Currently, she is harassing the oldest Security guard there; a 72-year-old former Nun and ex-military.

So, the union advised my husband to just go with the flow until he retires - try and stay out of her way.

Friday, July 19, 2019

The Boss Lady and Flies

Whatever happened to the One-Minute Manager?

My first husband worked at Lockheed and was a manager and it was required reading. 
There were three simple tools, which each takes 60 seconds or less, but can improve how they do their job: getting people to stay motivated, happy and deliver great work.

Regarding a Reprimand:  "A one minute reprimand is more than enough to express your dissatisfaction. Expressing your dissatisfaction with someone’s performance doesn’t have to be a big deal either." Not this gal - she lectures, repeating herself over and over and makes every reprimand a BIG INCIDENT. I tell my husband I wouldn't stand there and usually he wouldn't either but he's got this retirement fear, that I guess many get when they are just a few months away.

So this afternoon, his union Rep will be there with him. He still doesn't know what it is about. She wouldn't even tell the Union. So that went nowhere.

I'll update tomorrow.


I am currently waiting for this special stuff they use in horse stalls. Should come next week. Since then, I have used just a fly spray, outside in the rocks - I think that is where they are breeding. It has helped a lot. Plus we hung some sticky fly traps and put some sticky fly traps on the window. That really gets them! So far, I only have 1 rouge fly who is going to get it, sooner or later.

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